I Caught Myself
by banannabee
Summary: Max is moved to Vermont despite her profanity ridden protests. She refuses to find friends like is suggested to her, but when Iggy and Max meet in detention, and Iggy introduces her to his friends, Max reluctantly finds herself admiring them, and the family-like structure they present, something she's definitely not used to. FAX! AH
1. Chapter One: Part One

**Yes, I'm technically plagiarizing my own writing. I spent a lot of time writing that shit and it came to nothing, so bite me.**

**Just kidding, I'm sorry to put you guys through torment. I really am :(**

**This chapter is UNNATURALLY long, by the way, but it's just so I can fit my chapter outline and get the stuff that GB readers already read out of the way. But there are some slight changes, like Max is really popular at her old school, and Sam and her are really good friends, so don't skim :)**

**MAX WILL BE OOC FOR A FEW CHAPTERS. Just want you to know it's not how she really is/will be.**

**This chapter takes place in: September, 25, 2014, Manchester, New Hampshire. NOTE: Yes, Manchester is a real place, and I've been there many times, but for the sake of privacy and awkwardness, I'm not going to be accurate with information from there. Thanks :)**

**PART ONE OF CHAPTER ONE:**

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><p>I've never cared much for phones.<p>

The buttons are so tiny and the screen is so small. I'd rather talk in person than text for an hour. Oh, and the waiting… that sucks.

Of course, if you can't hang out with your friends at the moment because, oh, I don't know, you're packing up your bedroom because you're leaving this coming weekend, I guess texting is an okay way to talk to people. I mean, I'm not bitter or anything.

I hope you caught the sarcasm. I'm not even mad about leaving this dumpy, boring old town, or this house. Heck, I don't even care about leaving behind the mediocre chocolate chip cookies on the corner of our street. But you know what I'm really pissed about? I had to tell my boyfriend on our one year anniversary that I'm going to be moving to another state. Yeah, how awkward is it to just spurt out that you're moving to another state, three hours away, while your spitting pizza chunks that he cooked himself?

Pretty awkward.

The thing is, it was never even planned. Mom just got home one day after work and said, "Oh, we're moving in two weeks. You should start packing up your stuff."

My mom is really _independent_, for lack of a better term. She gives me money to go do stuff so I won't bother her, she brings men into the house without any consideration that I'm in the room adjacent (I know, ew), and she doesn't even care if I'm at the house at all. Once, when I was nine, I told her that I was going to the store, and I ran away to my friend JJ's house. JJ's parents just thought that my mom was out of town, and that she'd told me to go to JJ's. They didn't even question it, they knew my mom was... unconventional. I only went back home because JJ's dad saw my mom in the grocery store.

Sometimes I think she wishes she was a teenager again, and that she hadn't had me at seventeen. I mean, I get it, and it's not that I mind, she doesn't get in my business, I don't get in hers. It's nice. But just this once, I wish she'd take into rumination that I have a good life here. I have three amazing best friends, and one of them is my boyfriend. I don't want to leave to go live on an island in Vermont, Just because she's interested in… I don't know, the weather or something.

I don't know, maybe I wouldn't be so angry about the three hour move if Dylan hadn't freaked out. He's really worried about a long distance relationship between us, and I keep telling him that with today's electronics, we'll be able to face-call each other all the time, and we can meet half way once a month on the weekends. He's still a little uneasy, but we're determined to make it work.

_Bing._

I open the text.

_hey babe :3 I have something for you._

Dylan Gunther-Hagen is just perfect. His eyes, the color of turquoise, sandy brown hair, soft jaw line, spectacular smile, great teeth, amazing personality. Fun and carefree, but he knows when to be serious, and when to listen to me. The way he makes me sound incredibly stupid when I talk about him enrages me, but I love him for it. And he gives me stuff, and it shows that he thinks about me, which is more than I've gotten from anyone else, except JJ and Sam.

_and what might that be? _I reply.

_come over tomorrow night around eight and i'll show you ;)_

_ooh sounds interesting… ill be there_

I smiled at the prospect. I was just sitting in my room, with four white walls, bare surfaces, my bed stripped of all dressings, and my feet surrounded in boxes. It was empty. Never again filled with my boyfriend, my best friends… Oh, Sam and JJ.

Dylan and I tried to tell them I was leaving, but they thought it was just a joke. We've always pranked them with things like that. We once got them to think I was pregnant. JJ didn't believe it, because I told her that Dylan and I agreed to wait, but after a few minutes she tried to act happy for us. It was hilarious to see their faces two and a half months later when they realized I wasn't blowing up like a balloon.

I thought about how much I'm going to miss pranking them. Sam and JJ have been dating for way longer than Dylan and I. JJ's told me how they've talked about getting married after their senior year. They're seriously perfect for each other, and I'm really glad that I've shared in some of their friendship, but I''m really sad that I won't be able to be a part of it anymore.

And Dylan...

You really can't understand the caliber of my resentment for my mother. I don't understand why we're moving to Grande Isle.

I stepped over a big box to get to my bed. I flopped down and let out a breath of air. I closed my eyes for a few seconds, and when I woke up it was seven thirty. I considered going down stairs to eat, but realized I wasn't hungry. Instead, I checked my phone for any messages, then heard footsteps up the stairs. Mom appeared at my door.

"Mackenzie, are you hungry?" she asked. I stared at her. We looked a lot alike. Blonde hair, brown eyes, relatively tan skin. She always dressed in very sophisticated business suits. I've never seen her not wearing one; in fact, I think she might even sleep in them. Right now, she was wearing a blue and white, pinstriped skirt-suit. She made it look good, but it repelled any motherly image that might come to mind.

None came to mind.

"No thanks, I'm fine," I said. She shrugged, and was about to leave, but at the last second, she turned around.

"I know I'm not much of a cook, but if you do get hungry, I've set out a plate of fish in the kitchen." And with that, she turned and left.

I frowned. The last time my mother had ever made me a meal, I was seven years old and my right hand was broken. Maybe she knew I was upset with her for making us move. It seemed improbable that she would notice such a thing, even though I screamed profanities at her for an hour after she told me.

There was no point in doing homework. I'd be starting with a new curriculum in less than a week, and the grades won't matter. So instead, I decided I would check out the fish. I walked down stairs and saw my mom on the couch, chowing down a bowl of popcorn and watching a movie in her respectable pantsuit.

"Umm… What are you watching?" I asked.

"Wolfblood," she answered simply. I cocked an eyebrow.

"Wait, the cheaply animated Brittish show?"

"Yes," she said matter-of-factly. "It's a sci-fi."

"Is it?" I said. "I've only seen the first episode."

"It's good." At this point she looked over at me and motioned to the bowl in her hands. "Popcorn?"

I was so shocked that she was offering me popcorn that I nodded eagerly and sat down on the other side of the couch and reached for a handful. We watched a few episodes of Wolfblood, not commenting more than once or twice, sharing the popcorn. I can't explain to you how weird it was. I guess if you ignored the bad animation, the show wasn't that bad. But the weird part was that I was watching it with my _mom_, who never spent time with me, let alone offered me popcorn.

After we were finished, Mom got up to go set the popcorn bowl in the kitchen. I took that as my cue to leave and then she walked back in and cleared her throat.

"I'm packing up the office tonight, if you'd like to join me."

I wasn't sure if it was an invitation or a request, but I nodded anyways.

As soon as my head hit the pillow, I was out. We'd packed up the entirety of the office last night, as well as finished what was left of the kitchen to pack. The myriad of boxes were stacked in a tower in our living room. I'd set the last box up and trudged up the stairs to my room.

I got up to brush my teeth and moved my way through a card board maze into the bathroom. As I peered in the mirror, I noticed dark circles under my eyes and groaned.

"Ugghh," I said, pulling my skin down to look more deeply at the imperfections on my face. I had a zit on the corner of my forehead. Great. The last day at Manchester Memorial High, and they'll remember me looking like absolute crap.

I gave up trying to figure out how to get rid of it and washed my face with cold water. I grabbed my tooth brush and brushed my teeth as I walked back into my room to find a suitable outfit. Maybe if I wore something cute enough it would distract them from looking at my face.

I grabbed at the shirt I'd left out of the boxes and shrugged it on. Eh, clean enough. I took it off and then I took off my PJs and grabbed my jeans and some clean under garments and headed back into the bathroom to shower.

I trudged down the stairs with my bag on my shoulder. Grabbing some bread, I shoved it in the toaster, then pulled up a chair and sat down to tie my converse. I wasn't exactly looking forward to school. I had no idea how Sam and JJ would react. I mean, it's not every day that someone drops a bomb like this on their friends. I mean, I tried to tell them...

I sighed and walked over to the toaster, waiting for it to pop. As soon as it did, I kicked the cupboard.

"Oh my frigging word, how can I turn away for three seconds and have this burn?"

It's happened enough times that I really shouldn't be surprised anymore, but_ come on_. I'd like to have something in my stomach for school. Seeing as peanut butter, jelly, bread, and a toaster was really all we had left in the kitchen, I realized that I'd be going to school hungry.

I threw the toast in the trash bag hanging on the doorknob of the closet and grabbed my bag, walking towards the door. I snatched my keys off the entryway table and left.

I drove into the Memorial parking lot and parked my car. I jogged into the school with my bag slung over my shoulder, my stomach churning is suspense. Stopping inside the doorway, I looked around at the haphazard halls. My last day at Manchester Memorial High.

I can't say honestly that I'll miss this place a lot. Most of the people here are stupid and don't do their work. I would miss the familiarity, and that's about it. The few friends that I have I'll miss a lot, and I'm not that good at making friends. Whatever, I can find new ones.

I took another glance around the halls and saw JJ and Sam kissing over by their lockers and jogged over to them.

"Hey, guys," I said. "PDA much?

"Hey, Max," JJ said, and smiled. Sam nodded in greeting.

"So..." I said. I wasn't sure I was going to be able to tell them... How could I? _Hey guys, I know we're best friends an' all, but I'm moving this weekend, so bye, have fun without me._ They had no idea that I was moving. But I'd made a good effort, right? It's my fault they didn't believe me in the first place, though.

JJ and Sam waited for me to speak, arms loosely around each other.

"I have something to tell you guys," I said, pushing some blonde hair behind my ear. I swallowed thickly. The bell rang as I opened my mouth to speak again, providing a suitable reason for my "I actually wasn't lying about moving to the far side of the next state over" speech to be said some other time. JJ rolled her eyes.

"Okay, tell me in French class!" she called over her shoulder. Sam followed behind her.

"I'll see you in English," he said with a grin. I nodded, and watched them walk off together, hand in hand.

Walking to homeroom, I rolled my eyes. _Great, that "goodbye" moment was a bust._

As Mr. Jerms took attendance, I yawned. When the bell rang, I left, rubbing my eyes. I walked to my first block class, geometry with Mrs. Coories.

As she taught the lesson, I stared at my text book with a fervor that couldn't compare to anyone else's. I paid no attention to what she was saying. Coories droned on about Special Right Triangles and I rolled my eyes. This lesson won't matter anyways. They'll probably be teaching something completely different at the high school in Grande Isle. Instead, my thoughts were consumed with the inevitable moment where I'd have to let go of my friends, and move to a new town.

How could I gently imply to my friends that I was going to be moving this weekend? _Surprise, I'll see you in a month if this works out!_

It was kind of intimidating to think about, actually. I have a lot of friends; I have a good set up here. The teachers know me, I know where all their buttons are, and I can press them easily. Everyone in school knows me, I'm the snarky, party girl dating Dylan Gunther-Hagen: School Heartthrob. It's fun. I don't have to live up to any reputation except for being obnoxious and rambunctious. And hey, it's not like it doesn't come naturally.

I perused the clock above the door. It said 8:30. This is going to be a long day.

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><p><strong>Part two will be along within a day or so!<strong>

**I'm getting these along early so that I can take what I can of GB and transfer it to here if I need to. Besides the room part, I don't think I'll need much of the GB chapters. Then I can get started on the good stuff!**

**Let me know what you think!**


	2. Chapter One: Part Two

**Yes, I'm technically plagiarizing my own writing. I spent a lot of time writing that shit and it came to nothing, so bite me.**

**Just kidding, I'm sorry to put you guys through torment. I really am :(**

**This chapter is UNNATURALLY long, by the way, but it's just so I can fit my chapter outline and get the stuff that GB readers already read out of the way. But there are some slight changes, like Max is really popular at her old school, and Sam and her are really good friends, so don't skim :)**

**MAX WILL BE OOC FOR A FEW CHAPTERS. Just want you to know it's not how she really is/will be.**

**This chapter takes place in: September, 25, 2014, Manchester, New Hampshire. NOTE: Yes, Manchester is a real place, and I've been there many times, but for the sake of privacy and awkwardness, I'm not going to be accurate with information from there. Thanks :)**

**PART TWO OF CHAPTER ONE:**

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><p>By the time French class rolled around I was seriously thinking about faking sick and going home early. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a weenie, and I'm definitely not a down-and-out kinda girl. I'm strong. But it really is torment. My friends are my world.<p>

Now, obviously, I'm not going to actually fake sick. It wouldn't be fair to do that to my friends. They deserve to know I'm moving. Not that knowing this makes it easier to tell them.

Whatever, I'm over it. I can tell her, and we'll just move on. She may be my best girl friend, and that won't change just because I'll live three hours away from her, but we'll get over the unfamiliarity of not having each other around. She's got Sam, and I'll make some new friends. Maybe.

A plethora of reassurances rang out through my mind, and as I sat down in my seat in front of Mr. Forbes desk I knew I'd be able to tell her. Even if I really wasn't good at making new friends.

A minute later, JJ walked into the room and sat down next to me. She threw her bag on the floor and her hands in the air.

"I haate global studies," she said. I smiled.

"Me too," I said, "I didn't think the history of the Middle East could be so disengaging, and I usually don't mind that class."

JJ and I laughed.

"Hey, you said that you had something to tell me?"

"Yeah, I do." I said, and I swallowed. "I'm moving."

"Yeah, I know," she said, rolling her eyes. "You said that two weeks ago. Very funny, Max, but it's only funny the first time you say it." She looked over at me, expecting me to grin with her.

"JJ, that's my own rule. Trust me, I know." I said, looking down. I couldn't look her in the eyes.

"WHAT?!" JJ yelled. She stood up so fast that I had to blink to make sure I wasn't seeing things. "YOU ARE SO NOT SERIOUS!"

I knew it really wasn't the time or situation, but I started laughing so hard.

She sat down, and the teacher walked in, spouting nonsense about opening our books to a certain page. Mr. Forbes, or, Mr. Fancy Pants, as I call him, is probably the most OCD teachers in our school. His hair is always slicked back with a pound of gel, there's never a sign of gruff on his jaw, he rearranged his tie every three seconds, and his bottle of hand sanitizer was bigger than a gallon of milk.

Truth is, I'm gonna miss "getting sick" in this guys classroom.

"Mackenzie Andromeda Janssen, I swear, if you're shitting me, I'm going to go find a gun and shoot your foot," she whispered, quite aggressively. I grimaced, and JJ's slightly relieved smile fell off her face after a few seconds. "Wait, so… you're really not kidding?" she said. I shook my head, and looked back down at my text book. I slipped my hair back into a pony tail, and concentrated on reading along with Mr. Fancy Pants. I tried to ignore the glare of betrayal I felt on my right ear. "Max…." she said.

I glanced at her and smiled.

"I'm moving to Grande Isle, Vermont," I said. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught JJ slump at her desk, her arms crossed over her chest. "Sorry," I said, not knowing what else to say.

JJ and I had been best friends since the fifth grade. We became friends the moment we saw each other, and I haven't regretted it ever since. She's always been there for me when I really needed her, and I've been there for her, too. I was truly going to miss hanging out with her. "Hey, tell Sam for me, will ya? I'd rather have him be over the shock by the time English comes around."

JJ nodded and didn't say anything else. She frowned for the rest of class.

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><p>"So," Sam said, cornering me in Mr. Udette's classroom. We sat at our respective desks and I waited for him to continue. Sam had been JJ and I have been friends since we were all in the same homeroom in sixth grade. He was a really good friend, and I could always talk to him about stuff going on when I wasn't comfortable talking about it with JJ or Dylan, or if I just wanted a different opinion. Sam and I were close, and it's going to be hard losing him.<p>

"I hear you're moving to Vermont," he said dejectedly.

"Yep."

"Hm."

For a few minutes, we more or less paid attention to the lesson. I wiped my hands over my face and couldn't wait for school to be over. I knew Sam was really upset with the situation. He was just a macho man, and wouldn't show it. I wanted to hug him right in the middle of class, but I don't think him _or_ Mr. Udette would appreciate that much.

"You want some help packing?" Sam asked. He looked at me with a small smile that didn't reach his eyes. "JJ and I already talked about it. Whenever you're moving, we'd be up for it."

"Oh, well," I said, "If you're free tonight…."

"You're moving that fast?" he whisper shouted. I nodded. Mr. Udette cleared his throat and threw a glare at us. After he'd turned back around, Sam continued. "Oh. Well, I'm free if you want some help."

"Cool. Thanks man, that's really cool of you guys," I said with genuine enthusiasm.

"No problem," he said with a sad smile over his shoulder.

By the time school was over, and JJ and Sam had gotten into the car with me, I was feeling like the worst part was over. Then I realized that we would still have to go through the whole ordeal of saying goodbye for the last time. And I had a feeling that some gross emotions would be making a guest appearance.

The drive home was silent for the most part, except for the drone of the radio. Carry On My Wayward Son by Kansas was playing on 94.9 The Mix. Dylan wasn't able to make it, he said he had a lot of stuff to do tonight.

As I pulled into the driveway, I saw a group of uniformed men and Mom loading the trucks with boxes and furniture. I saw that they'd at least lugged all the boxes outside. Easier for us.

"Hello, friends of Mackenzie," my mom greeted somewhat awkwardly. She smiled (cough, grimaced) at them and handed a box to a worker. He loaded it in the truck as Sam nodded. There were stereos inside the house blasting AC/DC.

"Good to see you, Ms. Janssen." Sam said, and JJ gave Mom one of her winning smiles.

"Hey, Marian."

Mom nodded at them.

"Well, you might as well be useful," she said, motioning to the pile of boxes. JJ and Sam both grabbed a box, and I followed.

We hummed along to Back in Black and formed an assembly line, making it go by much faster. Within almost two hours, we were all packed in the trucks. Mom went inside to go through and do one last check to make sure we weren't leaving anything behind. I glanced at the FOR SALE sign on the front lawn and sighed.

"Hey, Max, I'm really gonna miss you," JJ said, tearing up. I turned toward her and made sure I didn't tear up myself. That's just not how I roll.

"I'm really gonna miss you, too, JJ," I said. I smiled wryly and gave her a hug.

"I'll come visit you when I'm free, and we'll talk on the phone, okay?" she said. I laughed.

"Of course we will. I'm not dying," I said, laughing. She punched my shoulder, and then threw her red hair into a low pony tail. Her freckles were magnified by her trail of tears. I looked at Sam, running a hand through his curly brown hair, his blue eyes hidden between angry slits. "I'll miss you too, Sammy boy." I said with a smile. He gave a small one in return, but I couldn't tell who was more upset about us bifurcating.

Now, Bon Jovi, in the middle of You Give Love a Bad Name, ceased to sing from the stereo in our house. I noticed a worker in his gray uniform coming out of the house with black speakers and mom followed, locking the door behind them.

"Well, this is superb, we are _all_ packed!" Mom said in an attempt to be upbeat and cool. I nodded.

"Yeah."

"Alrighty. Well, our last night is on its way. Are you hanging out with them tonight, Mackenzie?" Mom asked me.

The movers got into a big, company van and moved out of the driveway.

"No, Dylan wants me to be at his house in…" I checked my phone. It said 6:23. "An hour and a half or so. I should go get ready."

Mom nodded curtly in her business suit, navy blue with a white blouse. "Good, good, I'll be inside, then, living it up with Wolfblood."

"Don't watch it without me," I said, turning to follow her inside. I heard someone snort behind me, and I stopped.

JJ and Sam were both staring at me in shock and amusement. Once the sound of my mom shutting the door behind her was heard, Sam said something.

"You and your mom, actually hanging out and doing mother-daughter things?"

I laughed out loud. "When you put it like that, it sounds even more ridiculous," I said.

JJ and Sam laughed, and then there was a _q__uack. _Both Sam and JJ started picking up their phones; they had matching ringtones.

JJ held up her phone. "That's me," she said.

She opened up the text and started slowly smiling.

"What is it?" I asked, moving closer. She pulled her phone out of my range of view and showed the text to Sam. He started to smile, too. "Why can't I see?"

"Inside joke," JJ said at the same time as Sam. They looked at each other and started giggling, tickling, and nuzzling each other in my driveway.

"Ew, okay, goodbye. You can walk home."

I turned and ran inside, hearing, "Max! Wait!" and "Oh come on, we live fifteen minutes away!" and my favorite, "But this may be the last time you hang out with us! Forever!" It was followed by some hearty laughing, but it still made me feel bad. So I stuck my middle finger out the door at them, and before it could shut, I heard JJ say, "Wear something nice!"

I rolled my eyes. The only nice outfits I had were packed away in the box. Along with everything else I might need to get ready… I realized this at the top of the staircase.

"Well, shit."

I turned to go back down stairs with a loud sigh. Mom was in the living room when I got there and she looked up at me, puzzled.

"What's the matter?"

Another weird comment. She never cared about my exasperation. Or any other emotion I expressed, really.

"Um, nothing." I said. "I just have to go into the trucks and grab 'something nice' to wear for Dylan. He wants me to go over to his house, he has something to give me." I rolled my eyes like it was nothing. I mean, it's not a big deal.

"If you'd like to wear something of mine, you may," she said politely. I tried not to make a face.

"That's okay, I'm not really into the whole skirt-suit and sensible shoes thing," I said as graciously as I could.

"Well, I was thinking I might go casual tomorrow, but you can wear it if you want."

Mom? _Casual?_

There was definitely something going on with her. But, being lazy, I'll just wait until I'm sure I don't have to go into the truck for something suitable. I nodded reluctantly. "I'll see what you've got."

"Follow me."

I ambled after her, upstairs and to her room. She had two things hanging in her closet, one, a royal blue dress, and the other, a grey pantsuit. I'd been in this room so few times I could count them on one hand. The walls were white, like in mine, and the furniture was gone. The window on the east wall was closed tightly, and from the view you could see the downtown area in Manchester.

She plucked the blue dress from its hanger and handed it to me.

"I'll wait outside while you try this on," she said. "I'll be your mirror." She walked out and closed the door behind her.

I stripped of my jeans and my t-shirt, thankful that I'd shaved in the shower this morning.

I slipped on the stretchy material and pulled it down. Being the same size and height as my mom might not be so bad. But why would she have something non-skirt-suit?

Mom knocked on the door, then peeked her head through. "Oh, Mackenzie, it looks wonderful!"

I looked up and smiled. She motioned for me to turn around, and I did so. The dress length came right above the knee, it synched right at the waist, and had a deep, scarf-like neck line. The back swooped. I could tell because of the cold I felt on my back.

"I love it," Mom said. "You should definitely don that to… your friend's house."

"Mom, he's my boyfriend."

"Oh? I wasn't aware you had a boyfriend," she said, looking at me. "Is he good to you?"

"Yes, Mom, he's perfect. That's why I was yelling at you when you told me we were moving. Remember?" I said incredulously.

She nodded slowly. "It does sound vaguely familiar."

We stood there for a few minutes, the cumbersome weight of silence on our tense shoulders.

"Right," I said. "Do you perchance have any makeup I can wear? Mine's in the truck."

"I think I might have some in my purse, let me go down and get it. Meet me in the bathroom."

I strolled into the bathroom, the hall awkwardly empty compared to the previous mornings. Mom stalked up the stairs a few seconds later and came to meet me in the bathroom.

"Why don't you let me do your makeup?"

"Uh," I said. On the one hand, have my mom do my makeup, on the other, have me do my makeup. Neither hand was great at the moment. Figuring she probably had more experience than I did, I acquiesced.

"So, if you don't mind me asking-"

"Why are you doing this?" I blurted. My eyes were closed as she rubbed my eyelids with something sticky. She stopped.

"I thought you wanted help with your makeup…" she said, sounding confused.

"No, I do," I said, and she continued slowly. "It's just… At the risk of sounding extremely dramatic, you haven't paid any attention to me at all in the last… decade. Or so. Just… why are you all of a sudden interested in what's going on in my life?"

Mom just continued working on my face. She was brushing something onto my eyebrows, and it felt weird.

"Mom?"

"I don't know. I feel like I just kind of woke up a few weeks ago, and realized that I had no idea who you were."

I stayed still. I wanted to say something snarky, like, _Well, maybe you could've thought about that when I was seven_. But I didn't, for some reason. Maybe I was intrigued by the idea that she'd been asleep all these years, or maybe it was the fact that I couldn't speak because I was so irritated that she was only just realizing this.

It was silent the rest of the time she helped me get ready.


	3. Chapter Two

**New Material :)**

**I haven't gotten anyone telling me they hate/love it, so I'm not really sure if I'm doing something wrong…**

**By the way, expect a little OOC from Max for the chapter, and possibly for the next few to come. It won't last long, I promise. :)**

**Anyways, if you love music and stuff, I'm thinking about having a "soundtrack" thing going on. I'll name a song in the beginning, and then I'll put a *cue music* thing when you should start playing it, and hopefully, if you're an average reader, it'll have the desired affect. **

**I'll try it out for this chapter, and if no one likes that, I just won't do it again. Tell me what you think! **

**This Chapter's Song: Help I'm Alive by Metric. Don't forget to play it when I say *cue music***

**And… *Cue Music.***

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><p>I remember the pain. I remember the smell of smoke, and the high, keening noise emanating from somewhere ahead of me, and I remember hearing someone cough, weakly. I can't remember if it was me or not. I remember not being able to move anything except my fingers, and I remember being covered in something sticky, and warm. I remember the pain. There was so much pain.<p>

When I was finally able to open my eyes, I remember looking down and seeing JJ… And ahead of me, Sam and Dylan were starting to shift, hacking their lungs and lifting an arm. I remember I was sobbing, and I remember being sure someone screamed for help, but I had no idea who it might of been, because it definitely wasn't JJ. There was too much blood.

* * *

><p>On my drive to Dylan's house, I was really nervous. I had no idea what he had for me. Was it a necklace? Or maybe he wanted to give me a promise ring… a promise that even while we're far away, we'll be together… Or maybe he just wanted to make me dinner on our last night together for a while. That was probably most likely what was going to happen.<p>

But when I pulled onto Dylan's street, I knew that it was not just a simple supper. Dozens of cars were parked along the sidewalks and music was faintly beating through the walls of his house, getting louder as I got closer, both floors lit up like a Christmas tree. I grinned. This is what I was used to. Lit up parties and fun people, playing stupid games, enjoying the company. Dylan is the best boyfriend I'm ever going to have. A huge sigh of relief broke from my lips.

Sweet familiarity. Something I haven't had the pleasure of experiencing in the last twenty four hours, what with my mom's alien behavior and having to ruin my friends' day.

I pulled up along the sidewalk, a few hundred feet from his house, and got out, walking in my mom's uncomfortable "casual heels." I heard lots of laughing and clinking and music. When I reached his house, I was shocked to see JJ and Sam waiting in the entrance for me, huge grins on their faces. They pulled me into the house, each taking one of my arms, and telling me something. I grinned even though I couldn't hear them; I got the gist of it.

I was sucked into a swirling crowd of people and pushed into the middle of Dylan's kitchen. He was there playing a round of beer pong with Matthew, a friend from our science class. He just got a ball in Matthew's cup and Matthew sloshed it down, ruffling his brown hair afterwards and starting to throw the ball back. Dylan noticed me standing behind Matthew and stopped the game.

"Hey, babe!" he yelled over the music, pushing through people to get to me. "You look great! How are you?"

I grinned as he kissed me and wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

"I'm wonderful now," I said, going in for another kiss. He looked positively elated to see me, and though Im sure he was, the alcohol might have something to do with the funny grin adorning his face.

"Would you like to play a round of beer pong with me, m'lady?" Dylan said, bowing and motioning to Matthew's spot at the end of the table. The people in the kitchen were chatting and some were moving their hips a little to the music, and some were singing along at the top of their lungs. The bass was turned up and I could feel it in my feet. I nodded eagerly. I was well overdue for a good game of beer pong. Dylan and I were the Pong masters.

I positioned myself in Matthew's place and JJ came up and stood beside me. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Sam take his place at Dylan's side and they high-fived for good luck. Matthew poured cheap beer back into my cups and set the rest of the beer down at his feet, ready to watch the game with a few others.

"Ladies first," Dylan said. I smiled.

"That's right."

I threw the ball straight into the cup closest to me and he snickered. Chugging the beer, he grabbed the ball from the bottom and aimed it right at me. It landed in the center cup of the last row. I smiled and downed the bitter liquid, feeling the ping pong ball fall against my lips. I held the ball in my mouth and aimed it straight for the middle cup in the third row. He wanted to play fancy? I'll put him to the test.

I heaved out a huge breath and the beer sloshed as the object hit its target. Dylan nodded in approval.

"Not bad, Mackenzie. But I can definitely do better." Dylan said after he chugged the beer. He turned around, looking for something, and when he'd found it, he grabbed it and dragged it to the edge of the table. I peered around the many bodies and cups of beer and saw that he was now stepping onto one of the kitchen chairs, backwards, sitting on it and bending his back to be able to look at the wooden surface covered in containers of alcohol.

"Bring it on, Pretty Boy," I grinned devilishly.

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><p>I was so sloshed that I couldn't stand up straight. Dylan and I leaned against each other, laughing hard. I glanced behind me with a sway and noticed something funny. JJ and Sam kept giggling, and I giggled too. They're eyes were red but I didn't know why. Maybe they were evil. I giggled again at the thought.<p>

Dylan and I had finished playing the game… with the ping pings and the beer beers a little bit ago. I don't know who it won, but I'm pretty sure I did it.

"Dylan, what clock is it?" I asked him with a juicy smile. He grinned at me and tipped sideways a little bit. He looked somewhere above me, then answered my question.

"It's time to go home," he said, and his eyes started to leak. Somewhere in the back of my head I knew something was wrong, but at the moment, I tried to stop the leak. I brushed the tears from his face and got sad. "I don't want you to go home, in Vermont. That's not your home. You always said your home is with me," Dylan cried. I started to cry too, though I wasn't entirely sure why.

Dylan fumbled his footsteps and pulled me down onto the couch after him. We just sat there a few minutes, being sad together. After a while, Sam and JJ fell on the couch across from us in Dylan's grandeur living room. My head was only clearing up a little, but I stared at the clock for a few minutes, trying to discern the time. I couldn't make out the exact minutes, but I knew that I needed to get home. I stared around me with droopy eyelids that kept getting in the way, and realized there was almost no one left in the house.

I dropped my head down to look at Dylan, and poked him in the stomach. "I need home to go, please," I said politely. Then I realized what I'd said and giggled.

He nodded, looking up at me with sad, sad eyes. "Okay, I'll drive you home."

"Okay."

Dylan hobbled over to Sam and JJ, and a few minutes later, we were all piling into my car. JJ sat next to me in the back seat and I laid my head against the window as Dylan got behind the wheel with Sam abutting. In my fuzzy head, I had no reason to question why we were all in my car, and later, it didn't make any difference.

"Dylan," I slurred after a while of being jerked around in the back seat. "Maybe someone else should drive." He shook his head, resulting in more swerves.

"We're all the same drunk," he said, his eyes drooping. "It wouldn't matter."

"Then lets just go back, we're not that far from your house," I said. Dylan glared back at me.

"We're fine, Mackenzie, don't you trust me?"

I frowned. Of course I did. But anyone swerving this much behind the wheel probably should stop and go home. Right? That makes sense.

He continued to drive anyways, and I knew that when Dylan started to nod off that something was wrong. And when the tree rushed up to us, it was too late to try and do anything, even though I'd started to lean forward to grab the wheel.

* * *

><p>The first time I woke up, there was a ringing in my ears, and I knew that everything was wrong. I was cold, and my back was positioned awkwardly. My upper body elevated over an uncomfortable mattress, and the smell filling my nose made me want to gag. I heard a fast-paced beeping, and when I opened my eyes, I was all alone in the sterile, white room.<p>

The second time I woke up, my mom was sitting beside me, a sad smile on her face. An image of Dylan's face, looking up at me from the couch flashed through my mind. And then, everything else flashed into my head, too. The crash. The blood. The dust, the coughing. The tree in front of us. And all the lights, the sirens. And JJ, broken on the seat next to me. I turned away from my mother so that she wouldn't see me cry.

The third time I woke up I didn't pay attention to anything anyone was saying to me. There was a nurse all in my face and I barely noticed. I was more concerned with trying to come to terms with the loss of my best friend. No one had told me, but I knew. It's hard to be oblivious when all evidence, the sad, pitying smiles, the mental pictures flickering through my parietal lobe.

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><p><strong>Well, I hope you guys liked this chapter. Sorry it took so long to update, I hope it won't happen again, but you never know. :P<strong>

**Anyways, here in Maine we just got our first snow. Seven inches, on Nov. 2nd. Ridiculous, right? Ugh, two days after Halloween and it's already a winter wonderland. My mom keeps playing Christmas music and keeps getting out the craft stuff and I keep rolling my eyes and putting headphones in.**

**In better news, I got a part in the winter play. :) That's kind of cool. I live for drama practice, and the time I stay after school will probably be spent on TheNet, writing more chapters for you guys. Tell me how you liked this one, and if you didn't care for the soundtrack to go along with it or not. **

**Much appreciation for reading, even if you don't review :) Hope you had a nice weekend, and hope the rest of you week goes well! **

**With buckets of love, Dezzy.**


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